I believe that we have control over our actions, reactions, and responses. How we handle ourselves when we are met with challenging individuals or situations is our own “conscious decision”. Just because someone hurts us does not give us permission to hurt others.
I was raised to study very well. Good grades meant proud and happy parents. There were times when I felt like my sole filial obligation was to bring home awards and recognitions. In hindsight, I think there’s a line somewhere that is very difficult to draw. Does a child really fail his/her parents just because he/she fails in school?
I was raised Catholic. All the way through my Sophomore year in High School, I went to a Catholic School. I’m still Catholic. But, I have not been diligently practicing religious traditions. In fact, the last time I attended Mass was Easter of 2019. But, I would like to believe that I am a very faithful person. Hubby even once made an observation that I keep a pretty solid faith in God. He is right. Personally and professionally, I’ve gone through many high’s and low’s and one of the very few things that has kept me standing is my faith in God. So, just because I have become complacent on religious practices does not mean my faith in God has wavered.
I grew up in a broken family. Unlike most, I have no love story to tell of my parents. I have even heard conflicting stories of how I came about in this world. My (decd.) biological dad never married. My mom married my (decd.) stepdad. I wouldn’t go so far as to say that I was in a dysfunctional family. But I wasn’t in a very loving and tight-knit one either. But you know what, just because I didn’t grow up in the most emotionally ideal home does not mean I am incapable of providing one for my husband and children.
I don’t have the educational bells & whistles. I have Basic Education and a Bachelor’s degree. I started at the bottom and worked my way up to leadership positions. I used to cry so much because people took advantage of my work ethic and skills for their own gain. I have been neglected, defeated, discriminated, and passed over. But I kept going. I allowed myself to feel the anger and resentment but I didn’t allow myself to break or give up. I always stood back up and thought, just because I lost didn’t mean I would never win.
I had a miscarriage in 2013. I remember after that doctor’s appointment, Hubby and I just both cried in the car. And then, we had to wait for what felt like eternity to completely let my body miscarry. I remember agonizing, waiting, desperately hoping, psyching myself, and fervently praying that a miracle would happen. In the end, we lost Riley . A few months later, I became pregnant with Oliver. Just because I didn’t get the miracle I wanted didn’t mean my prayer wasn’t heard.
Aiden’s autism limits him from some of the perks this life and this world has to offer. Just because he’s limited doesn’t mean he is inadequate. I believe that God had a purpose when He blessed us with Aiden. The purpose wasn’t to test my faith but to give me a meaningful miracle (yet again).
Our “just because” are just circumstances. We shouldn’t let it define who we are and what we can be. We are more than just our circumstances.